not much

my ipod was relentless on my way to the office this morning. every song had a memory or feeling attached and with each one all i could think was what happened to that girl? where is the girl who hung out with that bagel delivery guy in berkeley and learned to appreciate jethro tull? what happened to the girl who stayed in yves’ truck to finish listening to the tommy demos even after we had parked? where did the girl go who worked on avenue a and went out every night and enjoyed seeing bands? is it age? is it burnout? does it just happen this way?

the girl subletting my guest room is 22 and just got out of college. a really good college, too. maybe that’s what brought all this on. i feel like i blinked and ten years went by. but i also feel like ive done so much this year and made so many decisions and started on new routes that even if the next 10 years go by just as fast, i wont go through it without knowing what happened. maybe that’s what your twenties are for, wasting time. i did have fun, though, for a long time. maybe i just waited too long.